The Irritatingly Cliche' Meaning of Christmas
by Ziptango
Summary: A holiday one-shot. Raphael is his usual humbug self. Funny, thoughtful, and as always, an important message.


A short holiday one-shot. All usual disclaimers apply, and the clips of classic Christmas songs belong to...whoever they belong to. Enjoy!

* * *

**City sidewalks, busy sidewalks**

Michaelangelo leaned out far against a fire-escape railing letting his eyes roam the cityscape below. "All those lights," he breathed out and turned to his companion, "Isn't it great?"

Raphael, in a similar position, was putting half of his weight on his fore arms with fingers interlaced. He gave a bland glance to his brother, "Yeah. Chipper."

Mike tried not to let his disappointment show. He looked back toward the street. Starry lights bordered cheerily along every building. Store windows were ablaze with Christmas goodies for ogling shoppers. Carols and faint ringing of bells echoed crisply in the chilled air. Just what did it take to dazzle Raphael? Was it possible to steal his breath and thrust his brother's mind into splendor? Awe?

**Do you hear what I hear?**

Finally the turtle in orange spoke up, "You're such a Scrooge. Don't you even try to like it?"

Raph quirked a brow as if he was just challenged. Mike just couldn't leave it at that, could he? He added, "I said it was alright, didn't I?"

An almost ridiculously serious look washed over Mike's face, "Maybe, but did you MEAN it?"

Raph grunted. "I don't think you realize what Christmas is, Mikey."

**Do you know what I know?**

Mike folded his arms looking annoyed yet curious.

Raphael plowed on, "It's a single day for spoiled brats to hoard things. A single day that businesses take advantage of for profit," his voice was rising, " A _single_ day that everyone_ blinds _themselves from their own selfishness!"

**Do you see what I see?**

Mike's heart jammed down to the pits of his stomach like a punch. He thought Christmas was that deluded? Really believed it? Sadness and anger flooded him all at once.

**I couldn't believe what I heard him say**

"You don't get it do you?"

Raph looked back to the street, "Guess not. Now if you want to do something giving and Christmasy for me Mike, then take your cheer somewhere else and leave me alone."

Mike backed away from the railing stung by the bitter words. He gripped the edge of the roof and lifted himself up. One worried look back, and he was gone.

**Dash away, dash away, dash away all**

* * *

Michaelangelo released his grip on a can opener and pried the top open while setting it on the floor.

"Mrrow!" Klunk cheered and attacked the cat food by a jaw full.

The turtle watched the hungry animal as if in a trance. Why couldn't people be more like animals? So much more simple and easy to get a long with. He sighed.

**Like a mystery with no clues**

For some reason he felt an obligation to Raphael's depression. There had to be something he could do. He just needed to find what that was exactly, even if it took trial an error. Even if it took until Christmas. Even beyond Christmas.

Mike bent and picked the can up that Klunk was now attempting to lick entirely too clean. He patted the cat's head and smiled. This wasn't going to be easy, but he'd make sure the three ghosts visited Scrooge yet.

**A hurting human soul**

* * *

Raphael stepped through the door and shrugged off his trench coat. Hanging it haphazardly on a nearby coat rack, he then started for the kitchen while tossing his fedora on the couch. The aroma of freshly made coffee assaulted his senses. Pouring himself a cup, he inhaled the steam aggressively. The turtle returned to the living room and sat gruffly in a recliner.

**To take each moment and live**

It's the simple things in life that are the real pleasures, he thought. Not some overrated holiday. He sipped the pipping hot liquid, feeling it's glorious heat spread from inside out. He waited until it dissipated before taking another drink. Suddenly, a corner of the room lit up into an array of many extravagant, tiny colors. Raph spat out his coffee like a exploding shower head.

"That's better. It was awfully dark in here," Donatello smiled. He was wrapped head to foot with strands of Christmas lights, nearly mummified, in fact.

Raphael looked unimpressed, and rather damp.

"Ah, wait. Who does this remind you of?" Don grabbed a brightly lit red bulb and balanced awkwardly on his face.

Raph scowled and set his coffee mug aside. He stood from the chair and approached. Don was still trying to balance the one bulb, when Raph snatched it suddenly.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

He reached out and between his forefinger and thumb, he crushed a single little light bulb. All the strands when out, and Don's smile faded. Raph stormed out as if anything reminding him of Christmas was a contagious disease.

Don blinked. That wasn't quite the reaction he'd hoped for. What was bothering Raph so much to make him to lash out like that? Raph was always rude, but that was just harsh. He looked down at himself. Now he was in a mess. He hadn't a clue where one stranded started and another began.

**What happened here nobody knows**

* * *

Raphael strutted into the hallway straight for his bedroom. Unfortunately Leo's room was closer.

"Hi, home so soon?" the turtle in blue smiled cheekily.

**Meeting smile after smile**

Raph eyes widen as he attempted an about face. No such luck. A hand grasped his shoulder. He moved to swat it away, but Leo was looking strangely at the ceiling. Raphael couldn't help but follow his gaze.

"Is that what I think it is?" Leo looked back down to his brother's bewildered expression.

"Mistletoe!" Raph spat and squirmed to get away. Leo held onto his shoulders tightly and leaned closer. His eyes never blinking, lips puckering....

Has he gone CRAZY?! Raphael continued to thrash as Leonardo came much too close for comfort. Suddenly the _shiing _of metal erupted between them, and Leo tenderly kissed the blade of his katana.

Raph was appeared to be stunned, relieved, or both. Leo didn't miss a beat.

"What? I had to kiss something. That's the rule, you know. What were YOU thinking?"

Raphael wretched from his hold and sprang for the haven of his room once more. A nearby door opened and Splinter stepped out holding a mug with a drifting spicy aroma.

"Ah, my son. You look very shaken. Care for some wassel?" He offered his cup.

Raph shied away and finally plowed forward to his bedroom door. In the doorframe, however, none other then Mike himself waited.

**To face unafraid**

"Mike, get out of my way!"

"Not until you find the true meaning of Christmas!"

UGH, how infuriatingly cliche'! Raph looked about to execute a violent attack on his brother.

"That's enough!" Splinter hobbled up. Leo and an still-tangled Donatello came up from behind their master.

The old rat continued, "Is this true Raphael? You're dishonorable behavior as of late has to do with it being Christmas?"

The turtle was too surprised to reply. His Sensei, of all people, was in on this too!

Splinter put a tender hand on his shoulder, "My son."

**Listen to what I say**

"Why has this upset you so?"

Raphael looked away.

**Are you listening?**

"Why can't I just be?" Raph finally returned the gaze, "I'll think whatever of Christmas I deem fit."

**If only in my dreams**

To his surprise, the rat nodded, "It is a holiday with many meanings. But we have several Christmases to find a different one each time, and a year in between to apply its messages to our lives."

Raphael set his jaw firm still prepared to argue, "It's a childish human belief. Fat men and reindeer..."

Splinter smiled. Actually smiled. What was so amusing?

"It is a human trait to embrace simple things to grasp the more overwhelming spirit Christmas has to offer."

**Maybe only in our blind belief can we ever find the truth**

Splinter was right. He didn't necessarily understand now, but through experience he knew that someday he would, as was the case with many of Splinter's lessons.

Leo put his arm around Raphael's shoulder as Mike took the other side. Donatello yanked at a dragging light strand that had caught on a piece of furniture before joining the embrace.

"We'll figure it out together."

* * *

And so the turtle brothers and their Sensei convinced that Scrooge to face the irritatingly cliche' meaning of Christmas. What small understanding he did take away from their lesson, we may never know. The only truth is what we have learned for ourselves.

**Although it's been said many times, many ways  
**Merry Christmas everybody.


End file.
